I Feel Human, And It’s Unsettling…

Have you ever heard the quotes where your supposed to think like a superhero?

or a perfect hustler?

to be powerful, a pioneer or an inspiration?

Yes, I have too, but i honestly don’t feel like that most of the time. When I started my business i was stuck between a rock and a hard place. I had had an accident that would change my life and i also had been rejected from returning to work in my previous job role because they had no idea how to support someone with a disability.

I was at a loose end, with very limited options. So i decided to create RKVA. This was without any previous passion to be self employed, or to go it alone. It was a decision that i made to support myself, so i already felt like a slight imposter in the business world.

Everybody tells you to be fierce, to be brave, to be bold in the business world. To manifest your goals and dreams and to journal your way to the top. I just don’t fit this mould, I am process led and need a pathway to understand how to i am going to achieve what i want. So again from the beginning I struggled to connect with this idea of a powerful business woman who doesn’t take any nonsense from anyone.

I promise i’m not writing myself a pity party, I just want you to know, whoever you are and whatever you are doing, thats its ok to feel human. No one feels superhuman or powerful everyday. AND THAT IS NORMAL.

Recently a lot has changed for me, working internationally, a change in personal circumstances and family situations that have led me to look at the world in a very jaded way. People believe that you, as a business owner, can leave your personal life behind at whichever office door, home office, premises or shop that you work in. This is incredibly hard to do and bits of your personal life will slip into your business one.

I find myself day dreaming about how i can change my personal life in business hours, or i feel demotivated to get my task list done (or to even start it). On the flip side of this some of my most productive days are when i focus on my business to give myself something else to focus on, instead of whats happening in my personal life. I promise you this though, you cant predict how you are going to react. AND THAT IS OK. 

Life is unpredictable, life can be feel cold and unsettling, life can feel cold.

So, as we come to the end of this very deep blog post, you may be wondering why i have taken you to this dark place. I have brought this to light as it is ok to have those days where you don’t feel like a super hero, where you aren’t that stereotype powerful women who can juggle a thousand things, look fantastic and smile for more than 80% of the day.

Your human, and even though its unsettling to feel vulnerable, its perfectly normal. 

Be kind to yourself, and allow yourself time to heal and to deal with what is going on around you, as a lot of the time it is out of your control. You will be stronger and more galvanised against the next round with life if you learn from the current one. Good days and bad days make up your story.

Robyn x

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